‘I feel betrayed.’ My husband is splitting his estate 50/50 between me and his daughter — should I find another husband?

Dear Moneyist,

My husband and I live in Minnesota. My husband’s only child lives in Tennessee with her husband and their daughter. They both have very good incomes. I am an only child and, when my parents die, I will have no family at all. When I married my husband, I assumed he and I were now a family and would always look out for each other.

Also see: ‘My husband’s kids hate me and refused to come to our wedding, yet he is leaving them all his property.’ How can I negotiate to secure my future?

I recently found out that he is leaving half of all his assets to his daughter and half to me. I have always had my husband as 100% beneficiary on all my assets. Now I feel like a third wheel and feel like he and I are not really family. I feel betrayed. The way I feel may be wrong, but it is still the way I feel. I am very depressed about this.

My parents are leaving everything to each other and, when they are gone, whatever is left will go to me. So it took me by surprise that my husband is not doing the same. And women with children that I work with are doing it that way also. They told me that if they found out their husbands were only leaving half to them and the other half to their kids, they would be very angry.

I can’t help but think that — even though I am now 63 — there may be a man out there looking for someone to marry and have as his family.

T.S.

Dear T.S.,

Your are equating your husband’s estate plans with his level of love for you. If he is only

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